I’m comfortable with confined spaces.
I have a cozy, high ceiling loft that is a hallway short of being a studio layout. The only seating room my office has is the couch for my clients, my swivel desk chair, and a quaint little rocking chair that I sit in during sessions. I have a compact VW with a tiny backseat that could probably fit two people and a small infant…
There’s a comfort in it. Small stages with rusted microphones, watched by chill open mic patrons, with faint music in the background that barely carry out into the surrounding streets. For the longest time, that felt like my lane. And whenever I felt my passions sound off above a dull roar, I hushed them. I never asked myself if there would ever be a larger stage for me. A crisper sound system that could hear my every breath, gasp, & crack in my voice. I never considered whether it’d be my turn to do things bigger than I’d gotten used to.
…boy oh boy…
There are certain things I can feel or see peering over the horizon concerning my future. Opportunities and projects that leave me at a loss. I’m not afraid. Just stumped. Because I’ve always gone through life taking on exactly what I felt I could handle. Sure, I’ve overcome challenges. God has unfolded many miracles in, around, and through me. But even they have, in some way, made sense. It was only in hindsight that I reflect back on my life and think, “Good Lord. How in the world did I get through that?”
Now. That question is coming up a lot earlier: “Good Lord. How in the world am I going to get through…..that?”
Of course, the answer will always be the same.
And I’ll still laugh nervously. Take a deep breath and clear my head of any automatic trains of thought that seem to stall my stride.
The end of transitions tend to unfold in this manner. Like the beginning of a roller coaster’s drop: Your stomach and your brain start to wish you’d stay back on the ride’s platform. But…at some point, you lift up your hands, squeeze your eyes shut, and give yourself completely to the experience.
Completely to faith. And to Giver of the Ride.